Governor’s road to curing ‘virus’ starts with a mirror

The governor visited the Legislature for their annual confabulation as we plant tongue in cheek and "flASHback" on the week’s news that amused and confused:

» In his State of the State address, Gov. Neil Abercrombie condemned the "virus of absolutism" that he said infects politics. It’s one of those diseases that’s easy to see when the other guy has it, but a devil to tell when you’re catching it yourself.

» Abercrombie urged fellow elected officials to elevate the local political dialogue, and promised to set a good example himself. From now on, he’ll only bad-mouth his adversaries while sitting atop his high horse.

» The governor seems to have given up on the controversial Public Land Development Corp. and is instead pushing separate measures to allow development around schools, parks and harbors. The new initiative is called PLDCUL8R.

» The House Judiciary Committee heard a proposed state constitutional amendment to limit freedom of speech only to "natural persons." If that’s taken literally, a lot of legislators are going to have to shut up.

» Puna Sen. Russell Ruderman said it’s "high time" for Hawaii to legalize marijuana and sponsored a bill with several other senators to do so. It’s been high time in Puna for as long as it’s been Miller time in Milwaukee.

» Rep. Karen Awana was named House majority floor leader despite owing the state $6,800 in unpaid fines for campaign spending violations dating to 2008. In the House, it seems, leadership doesn’t mean followship of its own laws.

» Lawmakers want to tax sugary soda at a cent per spoonful to fight obesity, even though Hawaii has less of an adult obesity problem than most states. It’s the Ernest Benn school of governance: Find trouble whether it exists or not, diagnose it incorrectly and apply the wrong remedy.

» Eight passengers were stuck on the monorail at Pearlridge Center for more than an hour after power systems failed. The only consolation was that they were probably moving faster than parts of H-1.

» Maui County paid $40,000 to settle a federal lawsuit by a Wailuku woman who was shocked with a Taser gun by police in a 2006 domestic disturbance call. The court found the use of electronic force puZZZZZZZZZZZZling.

» "Hawaii Five-0" actor Scott Caan dissed Hawaii on a national talk show, saying life here lacks "hustle," surfing is more like "survival" and the food "sucks." Much like his acting.

And the quote of the week … from Greg Azus of Hawaii’s Natural High, on how he’d expand his business if marijuana were legalized: "I’d like to get educated about it to be able to prescribe certain kinds of marijuana or edibles for people depending on their ailments." Somehow, I don’t think he means eight years of medical school.

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Reach David Shapiro at volcanicash@gmail.com or blog.volcanicash.net.