It’s never the right time to utter ‘Hawaiian time’ cliche

The term “Hawaiian time” is still casually thrown about like a well-worn joke despite the ocean of offense it might cause.

T-shirts and ball caps with the slogan “I not late — I’m on Hawaiian time!” can still be purchased without much hunting, particularly at tourist souvenir shops and online, and in certain circles people still speak that phrase out loud despite objections of racism, ethnic slurs and flat-out incorrect stereotyping. After all, to live in Hawaii you have to work hard to pay for housing, buy breakfast and upgrade your smartphone. Hawaii’s beautiful vistas and balmy days may be free, but rent isn’t. We might not be jittery, anxious or hyperspeed like people from certain cities, but stuff gets done. Local government might have problems with deadlines, but individually there are examples everywhere of Hawaii residents who hustle and bus’ okole every day. Yes, people from Hawaii tend to show up fashionably late for parties and to have excruciatingly long and lingering goodbyes, but that’s different. That’s social, not productivity-related.

Yet the phrase persists. Perhaps not with the prevalence of yesteryear, but it’s still around. Tourists think it’s a cute catchphrase. They get here, and just because they’re on vacation, they think everyone is on vacation. It’s maddening.

(There is also the misunderstanding of the difference between “Hawaii” and “Hawaiian”, which is another topic altogether.)

And maybe the worst part is the “I,” the proud declaration of tardiness and languor, a personal defect blamed on an entire culture.

In his later years my father would bristle when anyone used the term “Hawaiian time” to mean late or lackadaisical or flat-out lazy. “Hawaiian time is the RIGHT time,” he would say. “It means waiting until the conditions are optimal, not rushing into something before everything is ready for it to happen. Why do something before it’s the right time to do it? You’re setting yourself up for failure.” He was quoting an elder when he said that. I don’t remember who said it first, just that it wasn’t an idea of which my father claimed authorship.

But recently I heard a new definition of “Hawaiian time” that stopped me cold.

It was from a young woman, a college student, who defined the term this way:

“ ‘Hawaiian time’ means we late because we got stuck in West Side traffic.”

Oh wow. The truth of that hurts.

Sadly, it can be applicable to Lahaina traffic. Or Lihue traffic. Or Kapaa traffic. Or some crazy snarl on Highway 11 outside Hilo. On Oahu it could be anywhere, because there is no longer a corridor of the island that is quiet countryside with open roads offering unfettered Sunday cruises. This new definition is from a generation that is distanced from the worn plantation-era ethnic insults but burdened with the reality of a crowded and ill-planned Hawaii where, even with effort, inspiration and motivation, island people can often be, though no fault of their own, very late.

Reach Lee Cataluna at 529-4315 or lcataluna@staradvertiser.com.