She Speaks: Welcoming new member of family a tough choice

One of the biggest debates a newly married couple can have is whether to add to their little family.

It’s something my husband and I have been thinking a lot about too.

We have a lot to consider. The biggest item is probably cost: It’s not cheap to add a new family member, what with food, clothing, toys and health care.

Young things also tend to be rambunctious, so protecting the house is another factor.

And we’ve been debating whether our current “child,” aka the dog, will get along with the new competition.

Finally, we must ask ourselves: Can we deal with another source of shedding and wet paw prints?

No, we’re not talking about a human baby here. My husband and I have been thinking long and hard about adding a new dog or cat to the family, but so far we haven’t taken the plunge.

The Hawaiian Humane Society has been a semi-regular stop in the past couple months as we weigh the pros and cons of getting another pet. Every visit to the cat houses and dog areas leaves us (OK, mostly just me) longing even more to take a new friend home.

Still, we have to be practical. As much as we want to adopt a fur baby right away, we are planning a trip soon and know it’s unwise to bring home any new additions just yet.

Our current living situation also isn’t ideal for a new pet, especially a young one. We are in a two-story house that offers lots of leaping potential for, say, an energetic kitty.

As far as our current pet is concerned, Tonks is a fairly independent dog — some might say aloof, or perhaps just old — who doesn’t take very well to new animal friends. He turns his nose up at most dogs and greets cats by chasing them.

The odds may not be in our favor now, but down the road we are fairly confident we’ll welcome a new family member into the fold. Whether it has four legs or two, we’ll love it all the same.

CHOPSTICKS UPDATE

Some folks were curious after my last column about the rules governing chopstick use.

There are quite a few, which isn’t surprising given the properness of Japanese culture. They include restrictions on how chopsticks are held in the hand (farther from the eating end) or in the mouth (never ever). Don’t stick them upright in your food, unless you are at an altar for a deceased person, and don’t pass food with them.

Japan-guide.com has an “Etiquette” section where you can find guidance on chopsticks. “Yuko Sensei” (“Teacher Yuko”) also has a good set of rules at smilenihongo.com/japanese-chopsticks-etiquette.

“She Speaks” is a column by women writers of the Honolulu Star-Advertiser. Reach Celia Downes at cdownes@staradvertiser.com.