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Off the News

For Wednesday, April 3, 2013


War looms? Bring in the golf balls

The military radar known as the giant floating "golf ball" with six legs has departed Pearl Harbor to conduct "routine systems checks at sea," what might be regarded as the driving range for the long hitters preparing to face North Korea's missile program.

The Sea-Based X-Band Radar built for enhanced missile defense may eventually be up against whatever nuclear weapons that can be launched by young dictator Kim Jong Un.

However, Kim is no Tiger Woods, and operators of the U.S. floating golf ball should be able to leave the big clubs in the bag.

A wedge rather than a driver should suffice.

Women have it pretty good here

A new study by the women's Web portal has concluded that Hawaii women lead the nation in longevity (average age: nearly 85) and in mental health.

Also, their rate of depression is lowest among women from every other state. The most depressed state was Oregon, and considering that Portland averages only 68 clear and sunny days a year, maybe it's true what they say about the effect of weather.

But the health reports aren't all sunny for Aloha State women. For some reason, Hawaii ranks 40th in women getting Pap smears and, surely as a consequence, Hawaii is near the bottom (45th) where cervical cancer is concerned.

Finally, the good news is Hawaii women have the least problem with obesity, with 47.4 percent falling into that category.

The bad news: That's only good news because it's worse everywhere else.

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