N. Korea’s not the only spot to find goofball politicians

The incoming is more radioactive than usual as we "flASHback" on the week’s news that amused and confused:

» The Sea-Based X-Band Radar, which resembles a giant floating golf ball, sailed out of Pearl Harbor to monitor themilitary activities of North Korean leader Kim Jong Un. Sending a golf ball to check on a goofball seems the right tool for the job.

» Though the state House rejected Gov. Neil Abercrombie’s plan to provide public school students with laptop or tablet computers, senators want to restore partial funding. The Senate compromise would tide the kids over with Etch A Sketches.

» The House sent back to committee a Senate bill to decriminalize possession of small amounts of marijuana, likely killing the measure for the 2013 session. Constituents who wish to comment can call the Legislature’s main number: 1-800-BUZZKILL.

» Senate President Donna Mercado Kim lectured nominees for the University of Hawaii Board of Regents that excessive spending by UH administrators has senators at their wits’ end. I didn’t realize that their wits had begun.

» Sens. Clayton Hee and Sam Slom couldn’t refrain from squabbling during the Senate’s daily meditation, with Hee thanking God for the separation of church and state and Slom praising the Almighty for suffering fools. I shouldn’t call foreign politicians goofballs when we grow so many of our own.

» A dating website offered Waianae $12 million to change its name to SugarDaddie.com. These are not very smart businessmen; for that much in campaign donations, they could have bought the state Capitol.

» Mayor Kirk Caldwell indicated he’ll likely allow 4 percent pay increases for himself and his department heads as proposed by the Honolulu Salary Commission. The only raises they’ve earned after three months on the job are eyebrows.

» Honolulu mayors traditionally give their State of the City speech in February, but Caldwell waited until the first week of April to deliver his maiden address. Was he staging a work slowdown until his pay raise came through?

» A City Council committee advanced a bill that would allow "limited-service hotels" in West Oahu. That’s a fancy term for empty rail cars.

» Linda Kwok Schatz, wife of U.S. Sen. Brian Schatz, promised at his campaign kickoff that she won’t let him get caught up in rattling cages or seeking the limelight.You’ve got to admire how she comes right out and says what she tells him to think.

And the quote of the week … from Donna Mercado Kim: "It seems to be a culture and an attitude of the University of Hawaii that they are above the law, they don’t have to be transparent, they don’t have to give information to the public and they can just spend money any which way." That’s the Legislature’s prerogative.

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Reach David Shapiro at volcanicash@gmail.com or blog.volcanicash.net.