The Legislature adjourned on an empty tank and the mayor’s race turned testy as we "flASHback" on the week’s news that amused and confused:
» Gov. Neil Abercrombie, who got no legislative love last year, claimed big wins this year on the OHA land deal, prison reform and the undersea power cable. It goes to show the power of shutting up.
» Lawmakers removed a troublesome "gap period" from Hawaii’s civil unions law. It’s the gap between when infatuated couples agree to get hitched and when they come to their senses.
» Legislators declined to replenish state rainy-day funds or put money toward unfunded public worker retirements. Why save for tomorrow when you can pay back your campaign donors today?
» A bill to charge shoppers 10 cents for plastic grocery bags was sacked. It’s just as well. The state arrests drug dealers for selling dime bags.
» A Senate Facebook page mislabeled a bill to overhaul charter schools as the "charter school ominous measure." It was possibly the closest thing all session to truth in advertising.
» A robbery suspect who led police on a high-speed chase from the North Shore was caught in Waipahu when he ran out of gas. Sounds like a typical end to the Legislature.
» In Honolulu’s first mayoral debate, Peter Carlisle and Kirk Caldwell took insult from Ben Cayetano’s barbs, including his comment likening them to "potted plants." I can’t decide whether he’s making my job easier or trying to steal it.
» Sen. Daniel Inouye said he was "deeply offended" when Cayetano called him out of touch on Oahu rail. He should take a lesson from Dolly Parton: "I’m not offended by all the dumb-blonde jokes because I know I’m not dumb. I also know I’m not blond."
» Transit chief Daniel Grabauskas deflected City Council worries about how he’d repay a new $450 million line of credit for rail, saying it’s "an additional contingency upon a contingency." It looks more like an additional pea upon a shell game.
» For the second time, the city sent a North Shore man a $54,000 water bill for his vacant lot. I hate to tell the guy, but he may be the repayment plan for the rail loan.
» County mayors launched a "Get Ready Hawaii" campaign to prepare residents for the next disaster. They’d better hurry: The next election is only three months away.
And the quote of the week … from Sen. Will Espero on his bill for a Kalaeloa spaceport to shoot tourists into orbit: "Hawaii will be able to embark on a new era in travel. Basically not going from country to country, but to go into that next frontier, space and lower Earth orbit." From way up there, we still might look like Hawaii.
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Reach David Shapiro at volcanicash@gmail.com or blog.volcanicash.net.
