Winners and losers amid the ‘Wonder Blunder’ mess

While we await the report by the state Senate Special Committee on Accountability and the next legislative session, it is time to total up the boxscore and declare the winners and losers in what will forever be known as the University of Hawaii’s “Wonder Blunder.”

The unredacted envelopes, please…    

Winners

1. The somebody — or somebodies — sunning themselves, probably in the Greek islands, today, courtesy of a $200,000 wire transfer that went into their pockets soon after it hit a Florida bank. Wonder if they have raised a mai tai or two in UH’s honor?

 2. David Simons, attorney for former athletic director Jim Donovan. He got UH to pay him $30,000 in fees and many more times that in publicity when President M.R.C. Greenwood proclaimed, “(Donovan’s) attorney took advantage of the situation.” Simons should never lack for clients among aggrieved UH faculty and staff.

3. The other lawyers, like the ones who charged UH for redacting the name of Stevie Wonder. When Sen. Sam Slom paraphrased Shakespeare’s line about “killing the lawyers,” there were a lot of heads nodding in agreement. UH has spent more than $100,000 on them for the ill-fated Wonder concert. Some agreements with UH allowed them to charge up to $300 an hour.

Curiously, though, you would think that people who litigate and frame questions for a living would be adept at answering them or at least avoiding embarrassing entanglements.

4.  Public relations people. Next to lawyers,  this is the biggest growth industry spawned by UH’s spending largesse. Whether UH is taking the pricey advice to heart is another matter.

5. Sen. Donna Mercado Kim (D, Kalihi Valley-Halawa) and her committee. Sharp, agile and relentless, she is the worst nightmare of bumbling bureaucrats, arrogant obfuscators and fork-tongued barristers. She would make a great UH president but is too smart to want the job.

6.  “Olelo. It had 131⁄2 hours of riveting drama and knee-slapping comedy live from the Capitol for the airing.

7.  The viewing public. Does anyone who watched not know the perils of a wire transfer or what a 92-f is?

Losers

1. The taxpayers/students. Leave it to UH to turn a $200,000 problem into a million-dollar-plus fiasco. So far the committee has determined the bill to be in excess of $1.1 million. And guess who will be paying the tab?

2. UH’s reputation. Manoa Chancellor Tom Apple is right about at least one thing: The school does need a re-branding.

3. Greenwood. She likes to quote a former chemistry professor who long ago advised her to “learn from mistakes but don’t get your whole education that way.”  Well, she got a PhD in crisis management in three months. The question is: Does she use it?

4. UH Board of Regents. Never have so many smart, successful volunteers been led so far down a garden path by so few.

5. UH Office of General Counsel. It got thrown under the bus so often there must be tire tracks.

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Reach Ferd Lewis at flewis@staradvertiser.com or 529-4820.