The state bucking union, the city trucking sewage

A touching trip down memory lane starts us off as we “flASHback” on the week’s news that amused and confused:

» U.S. Sen. Daniel Inouye visited local public schools he attended as a boy to offer inspiration to the current generation of students. If they study and work hard, he promised, they too can participate in destroying the country’s bond rating and crashing the stock market.

» The state Reapportionment Commission wants to move Ko Olina into the 1st Congressional District, sparing U.S. Rep. Colleen Hanabusa from selling her Ko Olina home as part of her promise to move into the district. I didn’t know we offered political concierge service.

» The Hawaii State Teachers Association said Gov. Neil Abercrombie “struck out” by rejecting binding arbitration in their contract dispute, leaving union officials no choice but to consider “all of our other options.” Even firing their drama coach?

» As the teachers union went before the state labor board to bash Abercrombie for being anti-union in negotiations, the governor was chilling out in Las Vegas as the guest of … wait for it … a labor union. His keynote speech was titled “Nanny Nanny Boo Boo.”

» University of Hawaii students are using a special tracer dye to track the travel of Maui’s sewage. The research is much more convenient for Oahu students, who just have to follow the city’s sludge trucks on their mo-peds. 

» The sludge problem could be worse, it turns out. According to the new state Data Book, the total amount of sewage pumped on Oahu in fiscal year 2010 was down 3 billion gallons from 2009. Somebody hasn’t been eating their fiber.

» Big Islanders lined up at Hilo’s Pana‘ewa Rainforest Zoo & Gardens to sniff the rare bloom of one of the zoo’s two foul-smelling corpse plants. Caretakers have nicknamed the plants “Stinky 1” and “Stinky 2.” Their official names are “House” and “Senate.”

» Across the Big Island in Waikoloa, 100 wild jackasses are being castrated and airlifted to sanctuaries in California. So now we know where the Golden State’s next generation of political leadership will come from, but where does it leave us?

» Police Chief Louis Kealoha said Honolulu drivers can keep up with traffic delays by following the department’s live updates on Twitter and Facebook. Expect further delays, however, when his patrol officers pull you over for tweeting on your cellphone while driving.

And the quote of the week … from Pam Mizuno, manager of the Panaewa recreation complex, on the corpse plant and its unique odor: “The smell comes in waves. You need to stand in front of it for a while. It doesn’t linger on your clothes, but it stays in your head. It’s definitely an unforgettable smell.” Kind of like election cycles.