Money, meters and microbes are on isle politicians’ minds

The Legislature is back after a recess that flew by too quickly and leads us off as we "flASHback" on the week’s news that amused and confused:

» Legislators are considering a bill to stop the use of unclaimed human bodies for medical and scientific research. If you’re out of ideas for improving the lot of the living, cater to the dead.

» The Senate is advancing a $500 million package of public works projects dubbed the "Invest in Hawaii Act of 2012." Priority will be given to projects with shovel-ready campaign donations.

» Chances are slim that the Legislature will legalize gambling this year, but lawmakers are considering a commission to pave the way for gaming in future sessions. It’s the same strategy that got them 36 percent pay raises in the middle of a recession.

» Rep. James Tokioka of Kauai is promoting a bill to designate a state microbe. It’s an honorary title that would be given to one of the legislators being gerrymandered out of their districts.

» A Honolulu accountant who also works as a Kansas deputy sheriff had to break up a fight between one man wielding a meat cleaver and another with a hammer. It looks like the House and Senate are getting an early start on budget reconciliation this year.

» The Abercrombie administration unveiled a plan to bring home 1,738 Hawaii inmates housed on the mainland by building a total of 900 new prison beds on Oahu, Maui and the Big Island. They’ll make up the difference by doing a better job of coordinating escapes.

» A deal with public school teachers for longer instructional days in select districts is "where the rubber meets the road" on school reform, according to the Department of Education. The last time rubber and road met in the DOE, they threw the kids under the bus on Furlough Fridays.

» City Managing Director Douglas Chin apologized for not notifying the City Council when he suspended debt guidelines involving billions in rail borrowing, and then claimed he also didn’t tell his boss, Mayor Peter Carlisle. The mayor has strict orders not to disturb him unless there’s a ribbon to cut.

» Part of the city’s plan to pay for a $28 million budget increase involves new parking meters that prevent drivers from using time left by the person in the space before them. This gives new meaning to petty cash.

And the quote of the week … from Hawaii County Council Chairman Dominic Yagong on the budget submitted by his election rival, Mayor Billy Kenoi: "I’m going to go over the budget with a fine-toothed comb over the weekend. As you know, the devil is in the details." Except in politics, where the devil is in the politicians.

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Reach David Shapiro at volcanicash@gmail.com or blog.volcanicash.net.