In this holiday weekend of Thanksgiving, and as we head into the annual season of giving and receiving, we asked several community leaders to reflect on what, really, there is to be thankful for.
These folks have encountered profound experiences in their lives — via direct loss, and/or in helping others through difficult times. They each have seen much sorrow and challenge, but somehow manage to channel that toward seeing the prevailing greater good in humanity.
Here are their messages of thanks and of hope.
I make no excuses, I am a horrible cook. Fortunately, I married a man who loves to cook. During Thanksgiving, I am happy to leave the kitchen craziness to my husband, my Filipino mother-in-law and my Chinese mother with results that are always delicious. The house is filled with appetizing aromas of two different cuisines mixing in the air. Turkey in the oven, lumpia in the deep fryer, fried rice with ham ha and lup cheong on the stove, pansit in the pan, bak choy with pork dumplings in the bamboo steamers… and in the middle of all this action is my rambunctious 2-year-old daughter.
When I watch this little rascal soak up the excitement of the holidays, my heart overflows with joy. I am thankful to be surrounded by family, friends and food. At the same time, I think about the work that I do at MADD and my heart hurts to think about our victim families who have lost a young child or loved one at the hands of a drunk driver. The holidays can be bittersweet, too.
Baby Aliyah Braden was killed on the Big Island on May 23, 2009. At just 17 months old, she became one of 49 fatal victims of drunken driving in Hawaii that year with hundreds more injured. I heard the news of this crash while I was still pregnant. Two weeks later I gave birth and started my job as the executive director of MADD Hawaii. Little did I know that Aliyah’s grieving father would be one of the first people I met in my new position.
I saw first-hand as he began working with our victim service staff and volunteers, channeling his overwhelming grief and anger into constructive ways to reduce this type of senseless slaughter on our island roadways. While finding a place in his heart to forgive the driver who killed his only child, he also worked tirelessly with MADD, local police and legislators to protect other daddies and mommies from ever having to experience this similar shattering heartbreak. The hard work is slowly, but surely, paying off.
Since Aliyah’s death, Hawaii became the 47th state to enact a new ignition interlock law, which took effect at the beginning of this year. Under the law, first-time arrested DUI offenders can continue to drive only if they use an in-car breathalyzer. Starting from zero in January, more than 900 in-car breathalyzers have been installed as of today. Such a rapid installation rate of this life-saving technology is virtually unprecedented anywhere in the United States. We also know that 3,192 alcohol positive starts were prevented in Hawaii over the course of 11 months.
On behalf of everyone at MADD, I am grateful for the community support. Our team of two employees works very hard each and every day to make significant changes thanks to the much needed help from committed supporters like you.
Funding cuts, a rocky economy and recession have made it even tougher for MADD to have enough of the financial resources we need to support our mission. During the interim, volunteers across Oahu, Maui, Kauai and the Big Island have willingly pitched in over 2,100 hours dedicated to grief counseling, outreach to families across the neighbor islands, evening victim support groups, hand delivering bereavement literature and responding to intakes from our 24-hour toll-free helpline.
These volunteers quietly take time out of their busy schedules to play a vital role in keeping our program running and they never seek out recognition for their work.
Mahalo from the bottom of my heart for taking care of MADD as 2011 draws to a close and as we embark on a new year. With your kokua, we look forward to a safer 2012 for all our keiki.
Jennifer Dotson is executive director of Mothers Against Drunk Driving, Hawaii Office.
