In this holiday weekend of Thanksgiving, and as we head into the annual season of giving and receiving, we asked several community leaders to reflect on what, really, there is to be thankful for.
These folks have encountered profound experiences in their lives — via direct loss, and/or in helping others through difficult times. They each have seen much sorrow and challenge, but somehow manage to channel that toward seeing the prevailing greater good in humanity.
Here are their messages of thanks and of hope.
We tend to forget that Thanksgiving is a cultural tradition that is uniquely American. Born out of the spirit of sharing and goodwill with those less fortunate, we have steadfastly held on to those principles for nearly four centuries.
In the milieu of cultural traditions which have become an integral part of our Island heritage, Thanksgiving seems to be the one that transcends many of the boundaries of religion, social and economic status or political preferences. It is simply a time to reflect upon all that is good and share it with others.
This weekend marks another milestone, as it was 10 years ago that we gathered as a family to celebrate the Thanksgiving holiday. Once the table was set and before grace was offered, as she would, for as long as any of us could remember, Adele would pause, and reach for her boys’ hands and say, "I am thankful for you, Nainoa, and you, Nakoa — you have blessed Dad and my life beyond words. We are very fortunate to have such wonderful sons; we are blessed that we have a beautiful home, that we can sit and enjoy all the comforts of life, good health, a loving family and friends."
We realized it could be the last time we would share Thanksgiving as a family for a while, as Nainoa would be off somewhere as a new Army officer the following year.
We missed Nainoa and Nakoa at Thanksgiving the next two years, with both being assigned Army duties too far from Hawaii to make Thanksgiving dinner at home feasible. Yet it did not seem to be hugely different, as we were able to connect with them on the phone.
Then came the deployments to Iraq and the reality of our sons in combat. The uncertainty was extremely stressful and each day would essentially be one of endless prayers for their well-being and for the safety of the men with them.
On the occasions when we got to speak with them, we learned that even under the most extreme circumstances, their thoughts went out to the Iraqis whose lives were totally disrupted by the consequences of war.
We were extremely proud of the experiences and lessons learned in their youth, which prompted them to want to do something special for the Iraqi children. Nainoa began a personal mission to convince his soldiers that their mission would be much easier if they addressed the day-to-day needs of those less fortunate. He began what was to be a year-long effort of a steady stream of children’s supplies, including those special aloha-print dolls that were distributed to hundreds of school children.
Having experienced the extremes of combat myself, I (Allen) am most proud of the manner in which Nainoa and Nakoa served their country. They along with the soldiers who served with them are the finest examples of the best our country has to offer to the rest of the world. Serving one’s country in uniform is not a sacrifice — but a privilege and a sacred trust that too few citizens share these days.
Mahalo to all the military families whose selfless service to those less fortunate is our gift to mankind. We are truly grateful for the opportunity of sharing the blessings that have been bestowed upon our family throughout the years.
Allen and Adele Hoe are the parents of Staff Sgt. Nakoa Hoe and the late 1st Lt. Nainoa Hoe; Nainoa was killed in action in Iraq in January 2005. Allen Hoe is a Vietnam combat veteran and a civilian aide to the secretary of the Army representing Hawaii.
