Kids of prisoners get holiday gift

For a few short hours, children who haven’t seen their mothers for months, even years, will try to forget the prison bars that separate them and celebrate Christmas together, thanks to a Catholic program known as Star Light, Star Bright!

For the second straight year, a party complete with Santa and gifts for each child will be held Dec. 10 at the Women’s Community Correctional Center in Kailua.

The Christmas program is the brainchild of Walter Yoshimitsu, chancellor of the Catholic Diocese of Honolulu and manager of diocesan services.

Since 2000 the program, part of a broader prison ministry, has served 2,310 children whose mothers are incarcerated, he said.

"The women always talk about how much they miss their children," he said.

His assistant, Paulette Vernay, who helped organize the program, added, "We thought, ‘How awful! How can any mother stand being apart from her child?’ There’s a lot of hurt there. Some of the grandparents I’ve talked to say the mothers haven’t seen their kids for several years."

The program was named after the "Star Light, Star Bright!" nursery rhyme that a child might recite while making a wish on a star.

It began simply with Yoshimitsu and Vernay getting the names, genders and ages of the children of incarcerated women, shopping for appropriate gifts and personally delivering them on behalf of their mothers. The gifts have always been purchased with donations from employees of the Office of Diocesan Services, and there are about 50 who wait with great anticipation each year to contribute monetarily or lend a hand, Yoshimitsu said.

By the third year, registration forms were provided, and the prisoners were asked to write personal messages that were attached to the gifts for the children, Vernay said. That was also the first year they started holding a party for the children and their caregivers, usually attended by about 75 kids, at St. Stephen’s Diocesan Center. Cinnamon’s Restaurant in Kailua has donated the food every year since then.

Yoshimitsu said there are group activities, entertainment and photos taken at every party, with copies of the picture given to mother and child. Regardless of whether a child comes to the party, the caregivers of some 200 children also received food baskets and supermarket certificates, he added.

"Last year it was Walter’s decision to see if we could have the party in the prison, but it was only for families on Oahu," Vernay said. "We have no money to bring families in from the neighbor islands. Hopefully, next year we can fly kids over. It’s harder on kids not to see their mom, especially at Christmas and when they don’t get a gift from mom. The bond between mother and child is so, so strong, and we want to help keep that."

At the first prison party, a period was set aside for kids and moms "to take a walk, time just to bond, quiet time," Yoshimitsu said. "When it was time to leave, the mothers had trouble. The expression on their faces said, ‘I wish this time were longer.’ It was a very heartwarming thing."

Vernay said she broke down and cried when watching the children initially uniting with their mothers, then — all too soon — their tearful goodbyes.

"The hope is that mom gets a chance to feel she wants to be home as a mother to those children," said Vernay, adding that the office is setting up a program to educate women about being good parents and resuming life on the outside.

Yoshimitsu likes to tell "a chicken skin story" about a wish come true. Four years ago a boy whose mother was incarcerated told everyone around him he wished Santa would bring him a bicycle for Christmas. The boy’s name was pulled from the hat by an employee who knew nothing about the boy’s wish but came across a terrific sale on a bicycle and decided to buy it, he added.

"When we heard the story, we were aghast," Yoshimitsu said. "We said, ‘How can that happen? That kid definitely believes in Santa Claus!’ Today I do! I believe that somehow if the person buying the gift looks at the name and prays, somehow that has some connection."

Vernay said there are enough gift sponsors for this year’s event, but food or supermarket certificates would be appreciated. Any leftover funds will go into next year’s program, and donors will be given receipts for tax deductions, she said.

Donations can be sent to St. Stephen’s Diocesan Center, 6301 Pali Highway, Kaneohe, HI 96744. Call 203-6722 or email pvernay@rcchawaii.org.