A renewed sense of romance is in the air.
With Hawaii’s civil-union law set to go into effect Jan. 1, same-sex couples here and on the mainland are eager to tie the knot in the islands.
Some are planning simple ceremonies to exchange rings, some will be renewing their unofficial vows and others have more elaborate destination "weddings" set for January.
Retired state workers Donna Gedge and Monica Montgomery of Honolulu, and at least two other same-sex couples, plan to be at the state Capitol at 12:01 a.m. New Year’s Day to become a legally recognized couple under the new law, which grants civil-union partners many of the same rights as married couples.
Gedge and Montgomery, both in their 60s, have been together 33 years and plan on a no-frills ceremony.
"We will celebrate with whoever is there," Gedge said. "We’re anxious to move forward because we’ve waited a long time. Our focus will be on us and not about a fancy ceremony."
The two women met at a gay support group. Gedge, a Punahou School graduate, said she was attracted to Montgomery the moment she saw her. Montgomery, who attended Kailua High School, said she liked Gedge’s voice and found something familiar and comforting about it.
On their first date, on Sept. 29, 1978, they went to a University of Hawaii Wahine volleyball game, and remain avid fans. They bought rings for each other after 20 years together. Though their families support their relationship, the women said entering into a government-sanctioned civil union is a significant step toward equality for same-sex couples.
"There’s a social support that’s missing in the community where we live because we’re not recognized legally," said Gedge. "Civil unions give us a powerful symbol we’ve been missing."
Applications for civil unions will be available on the state Department of Health’s website after midnight Jan. 1, according to Alvin Onaka, state registrar of vital statistics. Screen shots of the application and instructions are already posted.
Couples who use a licensed officiant should be able to go through with a civil-union ceremony in the early morning hours of Jan. 1, Onaka said. After their applications are reviewed, temporary civil-union certificates could be issued as early as Jan. 3, the first business day of the year.
There are no residency or citizenship requirements for couples entering into a civil union in Hawaii, although their relationships might not be recognized in their home jurisdictions.
The law also requires the state to recognize civil unions from other jurisdictions as long as they meet Hawaii eligibility rules.
Kelly Moore, 30, and Jami Richmond, 34, of Sacramento, Calif., are planning their dream "wedding" and reception on Maui for Jan. 14, with family and friends flying in from all corners of the United States to attend.
Richmond’s 4-year-old daughter, Haley, will be a flower girl.
Moore, who attended the University of Hawaii at Hilo as an undergraduate, says holding their ceremony on Maui is a dream come true.
"I fell in love with the islands," said Moore. "My ideal is a beach wedding at sunset." When she learned the civil-union law would go into effect in Hawaii next year, that sealed the deal. They booked a wedding package on Maui through gayhawaiiwedding.com.
Moore, a therapist, and Richmond, a nurse, met through friends and want to formalize their relationship.
They plan on having a sunset ceremony beachside at a private estate in Kapalua, followed by a reception for 25 guests. Both plan to wear white and exchange lei and rings at the ceremony, accompanied by a guitarist.
Even before civil unions were legalized in Hawaii, there was a strong demand for wedding-type services for gay couples, according to Kevin Rebelo and Frank Miholer, who launched gayhawaiiwedding.com in 1994, even though at that time no states allowed same-sex unions.
The response was tremendous, according to Rebelo, with couples coming from all over the world, including China, England and Italy. Their packages include assistance with Hawaii’s legal paperwork.
After a few years the company garnered such a good reputation that opposite-sex couples began asking whether Rebelo and Miholer could help plan their weddings, too.
The pair has coordinated about 5,000 ceremonies this year, about 10 percent of them for same-sex couples. With implementation of the civil-union law just days away, they’ve been busy.
Chuck Burks and Ken Lowstetter of Kihei, Maui, plan an intimate beachside ceremony on Jan. 4, with just a few friends on hand.
Burks is a yoga teacher, and Lowstetter is a former flight attendant. They met at a yoga studio in Palm Springs, Calif., and, after a seven-year friendship, began a committed relationship. Both are in their 50s.
"We picked out rings," he said. "I got real excited when we bought the rings."
No reception is planned, but Burks said they might celebrate at their favorite restaurant with close friends later in the year. Burks said they have separate health insurance plans, and he looks forward to getting coverage under one umbrella.
"When you’ve been out and gay most of your life, you still grapple with family dynamics," said Burks. "This will make things more secure for us as a couple."
An estimated 3,239 same-sex couples (7.1 per 1,000 households) live together in Hawaii, according to 2010 census data gathered by the Williams Institute at the University of California-Los Angeles School of Law, with about a quarter of them raising children.
Many gay couples prefer to work with wedding vendors who themselves are gay, but also like a coordinator who can take the guesswork out of which ones are gay-friendly to avoid awkward situations, according to Miholer.
"It’s important, especially for women, to feel comfortable in front of the photographer," said Rebelo.
While same-sex couples used to call one another "lifelong partners," according to Rebelo, many now simply say "wife and wife" or "husband and husband" during ceremonies.
The Rev. Fay Hovey of Aloha Maui Weddings officiated a beach ceremony this month for two women from Texas.
She has two websites: alohamauiweddings.com and alohamauigayweddings.com.
Hovey said same-sex brides and grooms are no different from their opposite-sex counterparts.
"They want to profess their love to each other in a setting that is beautiful and romantic, with the people that care surrounding them," she said. "There isn’t anything different."
In anticipation of the state’s new civil-union law, the 780-room Grand Wailea resort on Maui just unveiled Pilialoha (Beloved Companion) civil-union and commitment ceremony packages starting at $8,000 and a Civil Unions Plus Web page at GrandWailea.com/LGBT.
Carolee Higashino, founder of A White Orchid Wedding on Maui, which coordinates weddings statewide, just started a division specializing in same-sex ceremonies, although the business has been gay-friendly more than 20 years.
Steven Cook will head up the division, and so far he’s heard from a Florida couple interested in a booking.
"It’s been a long time coming," Cook said, "and I look forward to the increased amount of exposure it’s going to give our company as well as the islands."
