Someone’s getting ahead of himself

Steven Tyler is celebrating state Senate passage of a proposal aimed at protecting celebrities from paparazzi, saying that he and guitarist Joe Perry now "can go to Maui and walk around naked in the back lawn and write some crazy songs."

The Aerosmith lead singer and former "American Idol" judge told Billboard magazine that his Maui beach home doesn’t "even have windows," so he opened a bottle of nonalcoholic champagne to celebrate approval of the "Steven Tyler Act."

Not so fast, Mr. Tyler. It is not yet the "Steven Tyler Law," since the state House has not voted on the bill — let alone approved it — and its members have yet to exhibit the excitement shown by star-struck senators at an earlier hearing.

Let’s be efficient all of the time

It was good news but strange as well: The U.S. Army said this week it had found $495,000 to prevent the layoff of almost 300 BAE contract workers at Schofield Barracks through the end of this month.

What, did some general lift up his couch cushion to see if any spare change had slipped down behind it?

Where does one just "find" a spare half-million dollars laying around?

The Army here said the money was found "through efficiencies" by the Army Material Command, and though some of Hawaii’s congressional delegation applauded the move, it still begs the question that if the Army can come up with $495,000 when the heat is on (sequestration), why can’t it do that routinely?

Let’s check that couch again.