It’s the last Sunday in September, so it must be time to "flASHback" on the month’s news that amused and confused:
» After promising to take full responsibility for the cost of cleaning up its 233,000-gallon molasses spill in Honolulu Harbor,Matson Navigation Co. hedged on paying for long-term restoration of damaged ecosystems. Sometimes there’s a fine line between full of responsibility and full of …
» A foul smell likened to rotting flesh emanated from Foster Botanical Garden when its rare corpse flower bloomed for the first time in years. Confused lobbyists were asking, "Is the Legislature back in session?"
» Not yet, but Gov. Neil Abercrombie called lawmakers into special session on Oct. 28 to consider same-sex marriage, saying it’s best to tie this contentious knot quickly and away from the hubbub of a regular session. It’s the political equivalent of getting drunk and eloping.
» The governor moved to take control of the debate on Kauai over regulating pesticides and genetically modified crops, saying it’s too big a job for the counties. The state has more resources to count campaign donations from biotech firms.
» The city resumed work on the $5.26 billion Oahu rail project after a year’s delay, and managers hoped they’d still finish on time and on budget. The trouble with building a train to nowhere is you never know when you get there.
» Honolulu Councilman Stanley Chang proposed a bill to make lying on Oahu’s public sidewalks illegal. Chang and his fellow sign-waving politicians would have to make their campaign promises from the curb.
» The city is drawing a plan to regulate what Oahuans flush into island sewers. It’s modeled after the Hawaii Democratic Party’s plan to regulate who votes in its primary elections.
» Hawaii island Councilwoman Brenda Ford proposed a ban on a geological drilling method known as fracking, even though nobody has indicated plans to do so. In government, it’s never too early to start fracking things up.
» Hawaii U.S. Rep. Tulsi Gabbard, who was featured in Vanity Fair, joined fellow 32-year-old Rep. Aaron Schock of Illinois, who flashed his pecs for Men’s Health, to form a future caucus. Mattel is promoting it as "Barbie and Ken go to Washington."
» University of Hawaii athletic director Ben Jay outlined an ambitious plan to assure class and credibility for UH sports. His top priority is begging Dave Shoji not to retire.
And the quote of the month … from Robert Clark of the Hawaii Kai Marina Community Association, on Waianae residents’ complaints about his sludge dumping in their valley: "They’re saying that out of total ignorance, of course. If they were aware of what that material was, they would say, ‘Please let me have it.’" Oh, they let him have it, all right.
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Reach David Shapiro at volcanicash@gmail.com or blog.volcanicash.net.
