Crystal and Brad Dempster didn’t meet online or at a nightclub. The Kapolei couple, who will be celebrating their first Valentine’s Day as husband and wife, found each other in an unromantic place: the Kahi Mohala Behavioral Health hospital in Ewa Beach.
That’s where Crystal, a Moanalua High School graduate, and Brad, a Waianae High School alumnus, both worked — she in the children’s ward and he in the adolescent unit.
"It wasn’t right away; we worked together for a while," said Crystal, 26, whose maiden name is Frigaard.
"And you weren’t very nice," she added, smiling at her husband as they sat side by side and shared their love story that began when they met in 2010. "He’d put things out of reach so I couldn’t reach it — he’s like a whole foot taller than me. It’s like schoolyard bullying."
In his defense, Brad, 32, said he did it both "just to make trouble and because I liked her."
They spent their first date watching a B.J. Penn mixed martial arts fight at a friend of Brad’s. Three years later, on Aug. 24, the couple got married. Their wedding was not only a celebration of their love, it also marked the start of a special friendship for two young boys.
While Crystal now works as a family support specialist with the nonprofit Parents and Children Together (PACT) and Brad assists the homeless at the Institute for Human Services, the two have second jobs as respite-care workers for Navy and Air Force families through the nonprofit People Attentive to Children (PATCH). They work with children who have autism while giving parents a breather.
For their nuptials, Crystal invited her client, 10-year-old Josh Greenia, and Brad invited his client, a 9-year-old Jeep Yates.
"We sat them together at our wedding because when we were doing seating tables, we were like, ‘Well, he’s 10 and he’s 9,’" Crystal said. "They were very similar, they’re both home-schooled, so we sat them together."
The boys immediately hit it off, spending much of the day clowning around in the photo booth with oversize sunglasses, fake moustaches and Mario Bros. hats. They’ve been inseparable ever since.
"They go to the water park, they’ve become best friends," she said. "They hang out all the time now."
The Dempsters are even trying to organize joint respite sessions with the two kids. It’s not a simple task because they are not allowed to drive their clients anywhere, but they hope to work out something with the families so they can all go to Wet’n’Wild Hawaii in Kapolei, a favorite spot for all four (the newlyweds have season passes).
The two agree their common bond of working with children with special needs serves as a strong foundation for their relationship.
"There’s a lot that comes with working in this field. Our respite clients, that job is really fun. But just doing what we do, it’s not always fun, so it’s always nice to have someone to vent to that understands the way the system works," Crystal said.
The Dempsters plan to have children of their own, but for now their focus is on travel. They recently visited Europe, and next they’re headed to Japan, where Crystal was born.
But no matter where they go, they plan on continuing their work with special-needs children. It’s not an easy job, but it is rewarding — even in unexpected ways, like with Josh and Jeep.
Or like finding the love of their lives.
"If we weren’t doing this," Brad said, "we wouldn’t have met."
