Your nose for news gets a stern test as we "flASHback" on April events that amused and confused:
» Anthony Ching of the Hawaii Community Development Corp. claimed a persistent sewer stench in Kakaako is because there isn’t enough poop flowing in the pipes, and building more condo towers will fix that. HCDC has been more expert at shoveling it than flowing it.
» Visitors flocked to Foster Botanical Garden to sniff the rare corpse flower, which emits a rotting flesh smell to attract its prey. Folks had to go somewhere to get relief from the political ads.
» Quacking waterfowl took over the Kailua District Park pool, forcing a temporary closure as city officials pondered how to clear the birds and their feces. Finally a sewage problem that our leaders can’t duck.
» Makers of Secret deodorant and Air Wick air freshener have new scents they say smell like Hawaii. In light of recent news, perhaps they should have done more due diligence on what Hawaii smells like.
» Mufi Hannemann announced he’s running for governor as an independent, joining Republican James "Duke" Aiona in trying to avenge 2010 losses to Gov. Neil Abercrombie. Hannemann’s rallying cry is "Compare and Decide Again."
» Rep. Colleen Hanabusa’s U.S. Senate campaign issued a release billing her as the "Tita from Waianae." That must have been in her early days before she became the princess of Ko Olina.
» Sen. Brian Schatz got President Barack Obama’s endorsement in his race against Hanabusa. The president usually doesn’t take sides in primary elections, but he was grateful to find a Democratic senator who would accept his endorsement.
» The blind led the blind as the state held a financial literacy fair to tutor citizens on managing their money. Workshops included "Tax and Spend," "Maintenance Schmaintenance" and "Kick the Can Down the Road."
» State Sen. Brickwood Galuteria said we should respond to homelessness as we would a tsunami. That’s been exactly the Honolulu City Council’s response: RUN!
» Hawaii Democratic Party Chairman Dante Carpenter said the principle in the party’s lawsuit to close its primary elections is "hard to convey to the guy on the street." I don’t know, a power grab is pretty easy to understand.
» Auto dealer Jimmy Pflueger’s sentencing for reckless endangerment in the seven Ka Loko Dam deaths on Kauai was delayed a second time, until August, after Pflueger’s attorneys claimed he needed foot surgery and couldn’t appear. His foot seems strong enough to keep skating away from his day of reckoning.
And the quote of the month … from Foster Botanical Garden’s Scot Mitamura on the corpse flower’s stink: "It takes so much energy to produce the scent. The scent comes out in pulses and it also heats up." Kind of like the closing days of the Legislature.
Reach David Shapiro at volcanicash@gmail.com or blog.volcanicash.net.