Who knew that Gov. Neil Abercrombie driving a hack would be the big issue of the 2014 political season?
Or that we should care if people can’t pronounce the lieutenant governor’s name?
And exactly who wants to admit they are old enough to recognize the Ritchie Valens hit, "Oh Donna"?
This is the year when politicians are finding that going light and breezy produces a memorable political television commercial.
First up is Senate President Donna Mercado Kim, running for Congress against a paraphrase of Valens’ "Oh Donna" from 1958.
This can’t be a reason to vote for someone, I thought.
But after checking with promoter Tom Moffatt, who actually had a sold-out concert with Valens at the old Civic Auditorium, I learn Kim might be tapping a cultural icon.
"’Oh Donna’ was a monster hit in Hawaii; it hit the Top Ten, if not No. 1," Moffatt told me.
Still, there are questions.
At the end of watching Lt. Gov. Shan Tsutsui’s 30-second commercial, "Just Call Me Shan," you know nothing more about the fellow. His voting record in the state Senate remains unexplored, his work on the state Capitol’s fifth floor is unmentioned, and his hopes for political advancement are unsaid.
But, within 30 seconds, he gives you a smile and the fellow with nearly no statewide name recognition is working on the problem.
I confess to thinking it was a really dumb commercial until getting an unsolicited email from a local public relations and marketing expert who said she "thought it was a great ad and handled very naturally."
Still there has to be a place for issues to creep into the campaign somewhere during the political season.
A candidate, who asked to remain anonymous, last week mentioned that he was proud to be running issue spots, focused on his voting record. Then he got a call from an influential supporter who said, "Get your spouse on TV," and the campaign strategy changed.
In 1997, when Ben Cayetano married Vicky Liu at Washington Place, the governor got a superb partner, who became a great campaigner.
Cayetano ruefully noted that early surveys done before his second gubernatorial campaign found that the public saw his biggest positive accomplishment was "marrying Vicky."
A Cayetano commercial especially written by the late political PR guru Joe Napolitan titled "My Husband" featured Vicky Cayetano, and was cited by Cayetano as one of the reasons he won re-election.
Abercrombie opts not for his spouse, Dr. Nancie Caraway, but for his old car in his most talked-about TV commercial.
The spot is trying on several levels.
First, Abercrombie’s cab must be using a "Hawaii Five-0" GPS. Abercrombie picks up a fare — perhaps a mother and daughter, with the older one saying they want to go to Diamond Head.
Looking out the window, one passenger marvels about the new construction and is told that it’s Kapolei Elementary School. And then they beam at the just-finished rental unit Halekau- wila Place in Kakaako.
As it turns out, the spot was shot both in Hawaii and Miami, which is one of the only places to find a Checker Cab similar to the one Abercrombie used to own.
The question is not production costs — as Abercrombie says in the spot, "Ladies, it’s on me" — but motivation.
After the 30-second cab ride is pau, who feels more inclined to vote for Abercrombie?
All political TV commercials in one way or another are bragging about the candidate.
The trick is to appear never to brag. Candidates start their pitch by saying "I humbly ask for your vote," not "I’m way better than everyone else running, so vote for me."
Abercrombie won’t win or lose the governorship because of this spot, but he will have learned that when you live in Hawaii, a trip to Miami is really a waste.
Richard Borreca writes on politics on Sundays, Tuesdays and Fridays. Reach him at rborreca@staradvertiser.com.