Parents should learn options to promote healthy relationships

The recent high-profile stories of abuse involving NFL players is bringing focus to the problems of domestic violence and child abuse and neglect.

These stories are offering our nation an opportunity to talk about the importance of creating a culture of respect for others, including children, and to talk about the long-term negative impact of abuse and neglect on early child develop- ment.

Adrian Peterson, running back for the Minnesota Vikings, has been indicted on charges of negligent injury to his 4-year-old son, and Ray Rice, running back with the Baltimore Ravens, was captured on video inflicting acts of domestic violence on his then-fiancee. These two star athletes have been in the public eye in recent weeks in a manner that has sparked great debate about the issues of interpersonal violence. The facts are that individuals have been physically and emotionally hurt by the violent actions of these two men.

America is home to many cultures. This brings diverse practices to child rearing, and knowing what is best for a child is typically best left to a parent.

However, parents must be aware of disciplinary options that are age-appropriate, contribute to holding the child accountable, and promote a healthy parent-child relationship.

We always have known that effective parental options to physical punishment, such as time-out and redirection, exist. And we now know, thanks to a great deal of research, that physical abuse can adversely impact the development of children and have a long-term impact on the health and productivity of these children as they transition into adulthood.

One of the goals of home visitation services like Hawaii Healthy Start is to help parents learn effective disciplinary strategies without having to use physical punishment.

These services focus on helping parents learn how to build mutual respect and develop effective child-rearing strategies.

The program is designed to recognize that parents need, and typically want, information to build that life-long relationship with their children.

We encourage everyone to learn about services such as Hawaii Healthy Start, and we encourage everyone to play a role in the lives of children and their families, including:

» Taking the initiative to ask parents we know whether they need a break for a few hours to keep their stress levels down and help them to be able to take that break.

» Volunteering at local child and family serving organizations to help parents receive the help and services they need, and other family strengthening organizations such as Prevent Child Abuse Hawaii.

» Reporting abuse and neglect when we suspect it is occurring.

It is normal for the public to be outraged any time a child has been physically abused. We have an opportunity to come together as a community to do something constructive about abuse and neglect.

We should be asking ourselves: What role can we each play, as citizens of Hawaii, to prevent child abuse and neglect, and what is our responsibility as a nation to prevent these types of situations in the future?