When a grain of sand becomes lodged in the soft tissue of an oyster and getting it out isn’t an option, the oyster responds with a secretion that eases the irritation; gently applied, again and again and again. In time, a pearl is created.

The polarity resulting from the national election could be this kind of irritation and cause undue stress on the fabric of our nation. Or, we could seek another result. Dealing with change and relating to people whose opinions cause strong emotions of anger and fear could be completely debilitating or it could provide a challenging opportunity.

As we examine the divisions and differences that have appeared with the presidential campaign, we realize the enormity of this challenge. The extent of the divisiveness and the depth of the anxiety are quite evident and, similar to infections in one’s body, will only become worse if left untreated. The complexity of this situation makes solutions difficult: the divide between rural and urban communities, the different ways of understanding God, and the inequality posed by ethnic, economic and educational differences.

Being aware of these realities is an important first step. The goal isn’t unanimity of opinion but open communication; we don’t have to agree but we should be able to have civil conversations. Other steps toward healing: accepting our differences and embracing the richness of our diversity; being able to forgive things that were said in anger; discovering what we have in common; working for what is best for every American.

Sometimes, the acceptance of change isn’t easy. It’s difficult to move beyond our comfort zone; I’m still struggling with new technology and other things that challenge my independence and ego. Younger generations handle change better and seem equipped to deal with uncertainty, ambiguity and compromise. In addition, most of them accept the realities of climate change, gender identification, restorative justice, and addiction as illness, while some of us would rather resist and demand another government study.

Creating unity doesn’t necessarily mean liking each other; no campfire scene with s’mores and Kumbayah. However, it does require mutual respect and a desire to work together toward a harmonious community. Recognizing our commonality around the basic needs of shelter, food and water, health care, sufficient income, safety, education and meaningful work, can help us accept our differences while cooperating on the necessities.

The way forward will require effort on several levels and, from my perspective, will provide the foundation for a renewal of America’s greatness — not making us into something entirely different but transforming the strength and beauty that’s always been present into a fresh vision of who we can be.

Therefore, on a very basic level, it’s important that we relate to all people (all creation) with kindness and respect; gentleness repeated again and again. Once this is established, we need to follow our passion by selecting some form of community involvement: helping with a service project, participating in a faith community, volunteering with a nonprofit, serving as a docent, picking up trash on the beach, etc.

After these basic qualities of life are part of our regular routine, we can start having conversations with the people around us about the values being expressed by our actions. Before long, it will become apparent that we are clarifying the moral center that describes our community. Former disagreements will be forgotten, divisions will be surmountable, and the old feelings of anger and fear will be replaced with feelings of compassion and optimism — even thanksgiving.

Whether or not a “pearl” is created, people will be living happy and productive lives.

The Rev. Dr. John Heidel, a retired chaplain, is former president of The Interfaith Alliance Hawaii.