She Speaks: What’s in a name? With a common one, the struggle is real

My first and last names are quite common.

So common that one of my friends inadvertently reminded me of that fact. He kindly informed me that if I accidentally received a “hey baby” text message from him — it wasn’t intended for me, because he was dating my name twin.

Whoa. What are the odds?

Out of curiosity, I examined my name. Diane is the 98th most popular first name with 591,587 people in the U.S., according to ­howmanyofme.com, which draws from U.S. Census Bureau data. Lee is the 22nd most popular last name with 740,194 people in the country.

There are 1,329 people in the U.S. named “Diane Lee,” the site says. A quick Google search revealed that number includes a TV news anchor in South Carolina, a neurologist in California and a real estate agent in Florida.

I always wondered how parents decide what to name their keiki. Do they consult a list of baby names? Do they decide based on the name’s meaning?

The first name usually sticks with the kid, likely, forever. In Hawaii, Emma and Liam topped the 2018 and 2017 list for the most popular baby names, according to the U.S. Social Security Administration. Last year, 65 baby girls were named Emma, and 80 boys were named Liam in the state.

I conducted an informal poll of some parents in the newsroom. I discovered a few parents named their keiki after famous people such as musician Rickie Lee Jones and former first lady Jackie O. Another parent decided on a traditional family name, while another dreamed of her daughter’s first name. Others consulted lists of top baby names.

During my birth year in the 1980s, Ashley, Jennifer, Jessica, Nicole and Tiffany topped the list of most popular names in Hawaii, according to the U.S. Social Security Administration. The state Department of Health said there were just four babies named Diane Lee born in the state that year. I assume I was one of them (hello, world).

For real? That’s hard to believe.

Apparently my name twins are bookworms. When I attended Kapiolani Community College, I spent many hours studying at the library. One time as I was checking out a textbook, the librarian asked, “Which one are you?” Huh? I was astounded. It was the first time someone ever asked me that question. “What do you mean?” I asked. The librarian informed me about the handful of other college students listed in the computer system — surprise — with both my first and last name.

My name twins like to support local retailers, too. I am not the only Diane Lee who likes to shop at Fighting Eel in downtown Honolulu. The cashier always asks for my email address to collect reward points to make sure they go to me.

I RECENTLY asked my dad how he decided on my first name.

I speculated he probably wanted to name me something unique.

Or, perhaps, he wanted to name me after a famous celebrity such as Diane Keaton, Diane von Furstenberg and Diane Sawyer.

Nope.

I discovered my dad worked as one of more than a dozen cooks at China House, a Chinese restaurant on Kapiolani Boulevard that no longer exists. My dad liked the sound of the name Diane, which belonged to the restaurant’s bartender. When he shared it with my mom, she fell in love with it, too.

You don’t get to choose the name you’re born with. Growing up, it bothered me to have such a popular, common name. I feared the worst: What if my name twin committed a heinous crime? Would I get framed for her wrongdoings?

I once contemplated changing my first name to something less common. Celebrities tend to give their children unique first and middle names, such as Fifi Trixibelle (Geldof), Sage Moonblood (Stallone) and Diva Thin Muffin (Zappa).

Hmm, then again, I think I’ll stick with my name for the long haul.

Thanks, Dad.

“She Speaks” is a column by women writers of the Honolulu Star-Advertiser. Reach Diane S. W. Lee at dlee@staradvertiser.com.