Unless you were living under a rock, you had an opinion as soon as you found out.
Since the creation of social media, very few stories have reached the level of engagement as the one posted by Deadspin on Jan. 16, 2013 did, the world discovering the term “catfishing” together at the same time.
In a two-episode documentary on Netflix released Tuesday called “Untold: The Girlfriend Who Didn’t Exist,” the infamous dead girlfriend hoax surrounding former Punahou and Notre Dame star linebacker Manti Te’o is brought back to the forefront of our minds.
When the story was released,
everyone had an opinion, and they didn’t shy away from sharing it — whether online, between friends, over texts and emails, or on basically every news program on
television.
As Notre Dame director of athletics Jack Swarbrick says in the documentary, “I don’t think anyone can fully appreciate how big a story it became. It just swept the news.”
All of the what-if’s are addressed during the two-hour documentary that gives viewers the opportunity to view the entire drama through the eyes of both Te’o and Ronaiah Tuiasosopo, the person who orchestrated the entire ordeal.
The documentary begins with a surprise, as the story starts from the viewpoint of Tuiasosopo, who is now a transgender woman.
Immediately, the storyline is framed around how Ronaiah, who grew up in a large family where football mattered most, was in fact struggling to come to terms with who she was as a person.
The creation of Lennay Kekua, a fake online persona, allowed Tuiasosopo to explore her inner feelings, which ultimately led to going through a transition later in life.
Te’o enters the documentary beginning with his upbringing in Laie and how life is about “faith, family, football.”
The first really revealing moment comes in his decision to go to Notre Dame over USC for college. Te’o had grown up a USC fan and spent the weekend before signing day in Los Angeles on campus.
He comes home and tells a close group of family and friends he is going to sign with USC, but his father tells him to “make sure you pray about it.”
Te’o prays he wants to go to USC, but asks for a sign if he’s meant to go elsewhere. He runs into a man named Gary, who Te’o says is like a father to him. Gary says, according to Te’o, “You’re going to go to USC and you’re going to be the next great Polynesian football player. I always thought you’d go to a place like Notre Dame and be the only Manti Te’o.”
Te’o believes that’s a sign, and despite signing his letter of intent through tears because he wants to go to USC, he signs with Notre Dame.
From there, despite Te’o putting on a strong public face, we learn of his struggles dealing with, not only the culture shock of going from a place like Laie to South Bend, Ind., but also balancing his Mormon faith at a Catholic school like Notre Dame.
We then see the entire story play out from a simple friend request on Facebook turning into a three-year catfishing hoax that winds up costing Te’o millions of dollars and leads to anxiety issues that plague him during an NFL career that lasted 62 games over seven seasons.
The complexity of the scheme, and the countless different people Tuiasosopo pretended to be through texts and phone calls, is astounding.
Robby Toma, one of Te’o’s best friends growing up and teammates at both Punahou and Notre Dame, says, “If it is Ronaiah alone, then he deserves to be in Disney. The amount of voices, the amount of cell phones, it was just crazy (expletive).”
Conversations from fake brothers and fake cousins not just with Te’o, but with his parents as well, show just how far Tuiasosopo went to keep this fantasy world she created going.
But the real moments that hit the hardest from the documentary come in the aftermath of the Deadspin story being released.
Te’o’s life would never be the same again.
As he says in the documentary, “The hardest part for me was going in public and which once was, ‘That’s Manti Te’o!’ now was (whispering), ‘Hey, that’s Manti Te’o. That’s the guy that got catfished.’”
A skit from “Saturday Night Live” is shown mocking him. There was a Lennay Kekua bobblehead night at a minor league baseball game in which the package was empty.
There was a story at the time saying Tiger Woods, Lance Armstrong and Manti Te’o were the three most hated athletes in the world.
His sexuality was questioned.
Te’o discusses his issues with anxiety that he says started when he felt a tingling rush up his body before his first preseason game with the San Diego Chargers.
His mother, in tears, talks about how he changed since the hoax was made public — how he’s withdrawn himself from everything.
It ends with Te’o fighting back emotions as he talks about the lengths he has gone to to get through it all. He began seeing a therapist to help deal with the self-doubt that never existed until this ultimate public shame began.
The last thing he does on screen is says he forgives Tuiasosopo and hopes he and his family are cool (not knowing she is now a transgender woman).
The screen then fades to black, leaving the viewer hoping Te’o has also been able to forgive the one person he needs to the most — himself.