The killing of a wife and three kids by a husband, who then took his own life, in Manoa Sunday morning was likely the third domestic-violence killing in Hawaii in three months and the fourth high-profile domestic violence case.
Monique Ibarra, CEO of the Domestic Violence Action Center, said Sunday’s tragic incident, along with the three other cases, underscores the need for more awareness about domestic violence and more resources to mitigate the social, political and economic impacts of domestic violence on individuals, families and communities.
“I have not heard or encountered one that is to the magnitude that this crime is, but we have had other incidents of domestic murder and suicide in Hawaii,” Ibarra said. “This is the third that we’ve had in three months so it’s pretty significant.”
Paris Oda, 46, is presumed to have committed suicide after killing his wife, 48-year-old Naoko Oda, along with their children, 17-year-old daughter Sakurako “Sakura,” 12-year-old son Orion and 10-year-old daughter Nana.
Honolulu police labeled it Hawaii’s worst mass homicide since the Xerox shooting in 1999, when seven people were gunned down at a Nimitz Highway business. But police did not immediately attribute the killings to domestic violence.
Lt. Deena Thoemmes, head of HPD’s homicide detail, said during a news conference Sunday that there was not a history of domestic violence reported, and a motive has not been determined. Still, police said they were called to the Odas’ home on Waaloa Place in Manoa after an argument was reported.
Thoemmes said, “Based on the evidence found at the scene and the investigation thus far, it appears that the adult male killed the female and the juveniles with a knife that was recovered from the scene.”
Angelina Mercado, executive director of the Hawaii State Coalition Against Domestic Violence, said the Oda case will undergo a statewide domestic violence fatality review. She said the review includes factors such as the medical examiner’s report, feedback from the children’s schools, judiciary records and if there is a history of violence in the immediate family or their extended family. She said the goal is to understand what happened and to provide community recommendations.
“From our perspective (it’s domestic violence) when you have intimate-partner violence. Just the fact that he killed his wife, and the worst-case scenario is obviously when all the family members die, which includes the children here,” Mercado said.
Ibarra and Mercado recall several other recent domestic violence deaths in Hawaii, as well as a high-profile New Year’s Day carjacking and police pursuit on Oahu that begin when a man allegedly shot at his ex-girlfriend.
>> On Dec. 22, Theresa Cachuela, 33, a Waipahu mother of three, was shot allegedly by her estranged husband in a parking garage at Pearlridge Center. A minor daughter witnessed the shooting, but was not physically harmed. After an islandwide search by police, Jason Cachuela, 44, was found dead of a self-inflicted gunshot wound behind a home in Waipahu.
>> On Jan. 1, Elizabeth Fernandez, a 42-year-old from Kealakekua on Hawaii island, died in another apparent murder-suicide. The body of her ex-boyfriend, Garret Kaleohano, 43, was found next to a rifle with a seemingly self-inflicted gunshot wound to the head, and Fernandez was found dead of an apparent gunshot wound to the face.
>> On New Year’s Day on Oahu, attempted murder suspect Sidney Tafokitau allegedly shot his 39-year-old ex- girlfriend on Moanalua Freeway. She survived, but Tafokitau was killed by police after he wounded two of them in a shootout following an eight-hour pursuit in a car that he had carjacked. The officers survived.
Ibarra said having four major domestic violence incidents in Hawaii in such a short period is “off the charts, not what we’ve experienced in Hawaii. Horrible trend. I don’t even want to call it a trend, please dear God, I hope it’s not. But it’s not going down, that’s for sure.”
Mercado said the Hawaii State Coalition Against Domestic Violence annually measures how many domestic violence survivors were served by its members in a single day. She said in 2022, 847 survivors were served in a single day. She said the statistics demonstrate consistency of need over the last several years.
She said state Department of Health data shows that 13% of Hawaii adults report experiencing intimate-partner violence in their lifetime.
Amanda Pump, president and CEO of Child & Family Service, said family violence is prevalent in about 60% of CFS’ cases.
The nonprofit works to strengthen families and foster the healthy development of children through an array of statewide programs, which Pump said have seen demand increase year over year from 40% to 60% across the islands. She attributes the rise in demand to lingering effects of the COVID-19 pandemic, the rising cost of living, and natural disasters.
Pump said the Manoa incident serves as a reminder of the critical importance of addressing family violence and supporting those in vulnerable situations. She said she is intentionally calling the incident family violence rather than domestic violence, which is rooted in power and control.
“I’m hesitant to parallel the Manoa incident to domestic violence because I don’t know if that is what it was. There could have been other underlying things like substance abuse, coercion, it could have been mental health related,” Pump said.”It could have had a lot of drivers, but I think at the end of the day the message should be — when you feel hopeless there are people and places like Child & Family Service that could help and we are here no matter what.”
She said CFS offers a range of support to families, including preventative programs specific to the person causing the harm.
“If you are experiencing difficulty managing your emotions or you are getting upset, we want to help you regulate. We want to help you process. We firmly believe no one intentionally wants to harm their families,” Pump said.
She noted that from July 1, 2022, through June 30, 2023, CFS provided direct services to 15,691 individuals and touched another 110,000 lives through phone calls, referrals and educational presentations. Pump said she hopes the volume, which is about 7% of the state’s population, helps families understand that they are not alone and makes it more comfortable for them to reach out.
Ibarra said the stigma and shame of domestic violence makes it difficult to seek help.
She added that survivors are not always in a position to advocate for themselves or to leave, especially in Hawaii where the cost of living is great and there’s a shortage of affordable housing. Ibarra said it might be even more challenging for survivors who live in higher-cost communities.
“There’s safety in that. There’s pride in that, ‘Oh we live in Manoa, which is a safe community. These things don’t happen here,’” she said. “Yet domestic violence happens in every single community, in every single socioeconomic (category), and in every single ethnicity.”
Mercado said bystander intervention links to community accountability, but there are challenges.
One issue is that domestic violence is not always physical. It also takes the form of verbal abuse, power and control and isolation — behaviors that may be harder to see from the outside. She said another impediment is that people in Hawaii tend to live close to each other, which could trigger a “bystander effect, where someone believes that someone else will call so they don’t have to call.”
Mercado said Hawaii’s culture of privacy is a challenge as witnesses might be unsure of when to intervene. However, she said something to watch for is the presence of lethality indicators, which indicate an increased likelihood of domestic violence murder. Mercado said some lethality indicators to watch for are suicidal threats, access to guns, choking a partner, abuse of a pregnant woman, abuse of a pet, extreme jealousy, drug use and violence outside of the home.
A history of domestic violence is present in about 70% to 80% of domestic violence homicides. Therefore about 20% have no known history, according to a publication from the University of North Carolina School of Government, a government training, advisory and research organization. In these cases, researchers say relevance increases for lethality indicators.
While Hawaii has designated mandatory reporters of child abuse and requires the medical system to report gunshots and stabbings, Mercado said it does not require mandatory reporting of domestic violence.
“There is much accountability put on survivors, and there is so much accountability put on programs, but I think as a community we need to rise up and really take accountability for the violence that is happening,” she said.
Ibarra, Mercado and Pump said Hawaii needs more resources and their nonprofits are part of the more than 50 nonprofits in the Hawai‘i True Cost Coalition. Together, Hawai‘i True Cost Coalition members are working to ensure that a shortfall in government funding is addressed so they can fully meet the varying needs of the more than 500,000 Hawaii residents that they collectively serve.
Pump said, “We have seen more cases come in with additional violence and we’ve seen an increase in the demand for service. So having the same pot of money that we did 10 years ago isn’t covering the need that we need covered.”
Ibarra added that awareness is important to preventing domestic violence, yet many nonprofits dealing with domestic violence struggle to fund outreach campaigns.
“For a small amount of time we were able to depend on the COVID funding , but that’s not available any longer,” Ibarra said. “We need to look at what can the state do about that. I know it’s a tall order to ask, but the problems are not going away.”
How do you talk to your children about the Manoa killings?
Child & Family Service has set up The Parent Line, a resource for parents, teachers, and caregivers to learn more about how to talk about the incident with children and as a hub for guidance and resources. The service is free and confidential.
>> Oahu: 808-526-1222
>> Neighbor islands: 1-800-816-1222 (toll free)
>> Hours: Monday-Friday, 9 a.m. to 7 p.m.; Saturday-Sunday, 9 a.m. to 2 p.m.; Closed holidays
>> Website: theparentline.org
Are you or someone you know experiencing domestic violence?
Childandfamilyservice.org provides a comprehensive list of hotlines and programs for domestic abuse survivors, including:
>> Oahu: 808-841-0822, operated by CFS
>> West Hawaii island: 808-322-7233, operated by CFS
>> East Hawaii island: 808-959-8864, operated by CFS
>> Kauai: 808-245-6362, operated by the YWCA Crisis Hotline
>> Maui: 808-579-9581, operated by Women Helping Women
>> Molokai: 808-567-6888, operated by Moloka‘i Community Service Council
The Domestic Violence Action Center (DVAC) on Oahu also provides critical support:
>> Oahu: 808-531-3771
>> Toll-Free helpline: 800-690-6200
>> Texting line: 605-956-5680
For those needing national assistance, the National Domestic Violence Hotline is ready to help: 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) and www.thehotline.org
Source: Child & Family Service
What can bystanders do?
>> Don’t assume someone else is going to intervene.
>> Use the 4Ds of bystander intervention: direct, distract, delegate and delay.
>> An example of the direct approach is seeking out the victim and saying, “Hey, if this escalates, if this happens again, what would you like me to do?” Unfortunately, abusive partners will often put the blame on the victim if someone intervenes and can become more violent.
>> The distract approach attempts to get the perpetrator to take a pause. When you see abuse, you could try de-escalating the situation by asking for directions or asking a stupid question.
>> When using the delegate approach, you might try contacting someone with more power to intervene in that moment, such as law enforcement or someone who knows the abuser and victim better.
>> Those using a delay approach will check in with the domestic violence survivor and/or the abuser after the fact when they might be more willing to listen and more open to intervention.
Source: Angelina Mercado, executive director of the Hawaii State Coalition Against Domestic Violence
