The case of the kolohe (naughty) jaywalkers is probably the funniest crime spree ever solved by "Hawaii Five-0," but you’ll never see those crazy crooks caught on network television.
Created for this year’s Gridiron stage show at Diamond Head Theatre in August, it was a comedic spoof worthy of "Saturday Night Live." The show serves as a fundraiser for the local chapter of the Society of Professional Journalists, which sponsors internships for future members of the media.
Through the years, the Gridiron writers and actors, all from the local media scene, have earned a reputation for their humorous assaults on politicians, newsmakers and anything else that pings the radar on their magic table.
"The cast loved concocting and performing the ‘Five-0′ spoof," said Robbie Dingeman, the co-artistic director of Gridiron, who has worked in broadcast and print journalism. "As you might see from the crazy attention to detail, poking fun at the show is fun for those who are pretty big fans."
They took aim at "Five-0" like a rifle-mounted laser sight.
The CBS show’s interpretation of local lingo, character body language and — the Gridiron favorite — product placement were all in the cross hairs. In a nod to the CBS series’ main sponsor, cast members would say "Chevy" while sneezing and a car horn would beep. The audience roared with each "Bless you!"
The comic "Five-0" team included Chad Blair as Danno, Chance Gusukuma as Steve McGarrett, Lance Rae as Chin Ho Kelly and Mahealani Richardson as Kono.
Someone should book ’em — for a longer run.
"Nice collar, Kono," Gusukuma says. "If it weren’t for you, that litterbug would have soiled our Hawaii."
"Yeah, you don’t leave your Styrofoam loco moco plate lunch from Rainbow Drive-In on the grounds of Kualoa Ranch," Richardson says. "Not on my watch."
When asked what the real show’s actors thought of the ribbing, a CBS spokeswoman had no official comment, but noted that some of them had laughed at the satire.
We just obtained a video clip of the skit, and it’s just as funny as it was live on stage. Plus, you can replay it as much as you want. Find it with the online version of this column at www.staradvertiser.com.
AT FIRST glance the 1986 film "Karate Kid, Part II" would seem out of place as part of the "Made in Hawaii" section in this year’s Hawaii International Film Festival, which opened Thursday.
But this is the film’s 25th-anniversary year, and because Hollywood shot it in Hawaii, festival program director Anderson Le wanted to mark the occasion.
"Serendipity, I suppose," he said in an email. "I’ve always wanted to show ‘Karate Kid, Part II’ because it is an ’80s cult classic."
The film was a sequel and, like the original, starred Pat Morita as the wise martial arts instructor Mr. Miyagi and a young Ralph Macchio as his pupil, Daniel La Russo. It was also the acting debut of Tamlyn Tomita as Daniel’s young love interest.
But Macchio’s character wasn’t the only one smitten by Tomita, who will attend the festival as a juror.
"Growing up in the ’80s and in Hawaii it was a thrill to see my hometown on the big screen," Le said. "Plus, Ralph Macchio was cool, Pat Morita was legendary and I had the biggest crush on Tamlyn Tomita!"
"Karate Kid, Part II" will screen at 9 p.m. Monday at the Dole Cannery Stadium 18. Tomita will be there.
AND that’s a wrap …
Mike Gordon is the Star-Advertiser’s film and television writer. Read his Outtakes Online blog at honolulupulse.com. Reach him at 529-4803 or email mgordon@staradvertiser.com.
