When you need help caring for an aging parent

Dear Savvy Senior: Where can I turn for caregiving help? I help take care of my 78-year-old mother but I still have to work. — Exhausted Daughter

Dear Exhausted: Taking care of an aging parent — especially when juggling work and other family obligations — can be physically and mentally exhausting. But help and resources are available.

To help you determine and prioritize the kinds of help you need, make a list of everything you do as a caregiver, big and small. Note the amount of time each one takes every day, week or month. Identify when you need help the most and which tasks others might be able to do for you, like making lunch for your mother when you’re at work.

Then list the types of care needed, such as companionship or doing chores, like food shopping.

Caregiving help

If you have siblings or other loved ones close by, schedule a family meeting, in person or by phone, to discuss specific tasks they could provide. See if friends, neighbors or faith group members could help.

You should also investigate resources in your mom’s town. Many communities offer a range of free or subsidized services that help seniors and caregivers with home-delivered meals, transportation and companion and respite services, which offers short-term care so you can take a break. Call your Area Agency on Aging (800-677-1116) for referrals or see ARCHrespite.org/respitelocator.

If you can afford it, you may want to hire someone part-time to help with preparing meals, housekeeping or personal care. Costs run $12 to $25 per hour. Ask for referrals from your mom’s doctor or hospital discharge planners, or try websites like Care.com, CareLinx.com, CareFamily.com or CareSpotter.com.

Financial aids

If you’re handling your mom’s financial chores, arrange for direct deposit and set up automatic payments for her routine bills. Set up your mom’s online banking service, so you can pay bills and monitor her account. If you need help, hire a daily money manager (AADMM.com) to do it for you. They charge $25 to $100 per hour.

BenefitsCheckup.org is another excellent resource.

Technology assistance

Medical alert systems (like Bay Alarm Medical, BayAlarmMedical.com) can provide a wearable “help button” to allow your mom to call for help anytime she needed it.

Install a video-monitoring camera (like Lighthouse Al, Light.house/elderly-care) that lets you check in on her anytime via your smartphone or computer. These cameras have built-in motion and sound detection and two-way audio to will let you talk and listen to her.

Websites like LotsaHelpingHands.com can help you coordinate care with family members.

Insurance questions?

If you have questions about Medicare, Medicaid or long-term care, your State Health Insurance Assistance Program offers free counseling and advice on these issues. Call 877-839-2675 or visit ShiptaCenter.org. The Medicare Rights Center staffs a help-line at 800-333-4114.

Jim Miller is a contributor to NBC-TV’s “Today” program and author of “The Savvy Senior.” Send your questions to Savvy Senior, P.O. Box 5443, Norman, OK 73070; or visit savvysenior.org.