Why I love ‘Hawaii Five-0′

Redux: brought back, restored

If you are just like me — which is to say a Hawaiian/Asian/Caucasian girl from Wahiawa — you probably love “Hawaii Five-0.” And if you are not said girl, you probably watch “Hawaii Five-0” at least to see Hawaii in all its high-definition glory.

And to see some hot Alex O’Loughlin abs every now and then.

Or perhaps you watch for bromantic banter between AOL and Scott Can, which is so charming in its sarcasm that you die laughing or at least snicker to yourself. Or you’re a former Lostie and you want to see Daniel Dae Kim speak English (and look sexy in board shorts diving for he’e) or see Masi Oka be so weirdly OCD that we simultaneously laugh and cringe at his strangeness. I like watching for “Shamu” the Shave-Ice Guy. He does have some awesomely catchy lines: “She confused me with a Jedi mind trick.” Nice.

I suppose if we lived in a perfect world, the new version of “Hawaii Five-0” would use the word “slippers” instead of the more generically acceptable “flip-flops,” bruddahs would drink Heinekens, and Kono would look like she actually has eaten a plate lunch in the past year.

But as I have been saying to co-workers and Twitter followers alike: this is Television, folks, and unlike what we see on TV, it’s not that perfect. But, oh, do they make Hawaii look good. Every week the Ala Wai looks blue enough to swim in and we all want to move to Waimanalo because it is seemingly traffic-free. Paradise has never looked more perfect. And that is exactly what “Hawaii Five-0” is supposed to do — give us an hour of hot males, fast cars, gun battles in former pineapple fields, a babe who can surf and throw a punch, and the newest bromance of the century.

What other way would we want to spend our Monday nights? You’ve read this before: This is not your dad’s “Hawaii Five-0.” It’s not brain surgery, peeps, it’s Television. On a television set, everything is done to make us believe in the illusion of the story and its characters. I worked on television and movie sets in the mid-’90s and saw entire homes repainted and relandscaped for just 10 minutes of screen time. I’ve sat under hot lights for hours as an actor’s stand-in so she can come in to say two lines in front of just the right light. I’ve herded hundreds of extras onto sets and then not seen a single one of them when I watched the final film.

It’s all about creating a look and a mood for the actors. And then the final picture is always amazing for the audience. We don’t know about the details of production, we just see the magic created for us on the screen.

That’s what’s great about “Hawaii Five-0.” The redux is magic. And I’m glad Hawaii gets to be its greatest star. They could shoot this series in LA. Who would know?

Well, we would. And then what do you think our complaints would be about? Enjoy the ride, folks, it’s not a bad Monday when we get to see Alex O’Loughlin take off his shirt, Scott Caan drink a Blue Hawaii, or Daniel Dae Kim on the back of a motorcycle. Even Grace Park catching a wave is a welcome sight. So on Monday night, be there. Aloha!

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Wendie Burbridge is a published writer, playwright and a teacher of literature and fiction writing at Kamehameha Schools-Kapalama. Most recently, her story “The Cave Man’ was published in “‘Oiwi 4, Kupa’a Makou ma hope o ka ‘Aina (We Stand Firm Behind the Land) — Kanaka Maoli Voices on Annexation, Statehood, and Ceded Lands.” As a student at Gonzaga University she studied Theatre Arts and acted in and directed productions in Spokane, Wash. She also worked in Extras Casting for NBC and Warner Brothers on various television shows and films in the Pacific Northwest.