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Within minutes of the opening of the season finale of “Hawaii Five-0,” thereby ending my hopes that our own Kelly Hu would have a more permanent role on the show, I’m sure the roar from the crowd at your house matched the huge “Whoa!” that filled Apartment 3 last night during The Pulse Finale Viewing Party. Our group was beside themselves with a mix of “OMG!” and “What just happened?” An explosive start indeed.
But not the kind of explosion that I thought would happen. Never would I have ever thought that the entire Five-0 Team would have been torn apart by one little Claymore mine in a sporty red car. Our “benevolent dictatorship” has now become a no-man show. No Governor to back them. No immunity or means. No Super Seal to save the day. I don’t know what part was more heartbreaking at the end. Seeing little Gracie’s sad face getting onto a Honolulu to Newark flight via the now-serving-the-East-Coast Hawaiian Air, or Kono’s bewildered face watching her Boss being booked, or our hero McGarrett having his mug shot taken. I know! Never in all of my strange pre-finale “Hawaii Five-0” dreams, would I even have figured that mighty McGarrett would end up a fugitive and in the back of an HPD car. No need for seat belts there, McG.
Even the good news that Danno is going to be a Daddy again or that Chin Ho has been reinstated to a Lieutenant in the HPD could soften that blow. I mean, wow.
If Wo Fat has orchestrated McG and the Team’s downfall, which I think is pretty evident, he is more of an evil genius than we may have given him credit for this season. From the start of the show, all of the evidence was starting to stack up. The charred remains of Chin’s ransom money making a surprise appearance, the nīele grandmother (read nosy old woman who should be watching her stories rather than walking around her condo in her housedress and cane) coming forward to identify Kono outside the evidence forfeiture locker, as well as the brass key that opens a drawer full of skeletons, just kept pointing toward the eventual ending we got last night. McGarrett taking the fall, Kono being stripped of her badge and gun, Danno without a family, and Chin looking stoic but conflicted on the other side of his friends.
Again, scream at the television or your computer screen if you like — we all were last night — in a nightclub, Book ‘em Danno cocktails in hand, Lacy Matsumoto spinning the tunes, DJ Maleko getting us to take a drink every time there was a dead body, Steve drove Danno’s car, or Kono was in a bikini. Well, we got to drink four times at least — three dead and Steve drove Danno’s car once. He drove his own 1974 Mercury Marquis (how cool was that car?) but that didn’t count, and sorry fellas — no Kono in a bikini. Even I would have enjoyed a little light-hearted bikini shot just to release some of the tension. The only “light-hearted” we got was Rachel telling Danno about their new baby — at the uber sexy beach spot of Sand Island — and Danno agreeing that they were going to return to New Jersey and live happily ever after. In New Jersey. Okay — soak that in for a minute — as I remind you that the only bromantic chatter had to do with Steve’s heaven which included looking for ammo belts and night vision goggles and Danno and McG argued over pepper spray and powdered eggs. Those were the only sweet moments we had last night. Even Kamekona’s scene was full of parolee angst about helping a friend “never knowing what you’re gonna need, until you need it” housed inside a rusted out shave-ice truck. Know what I mean, brah?